Learning this put me in a difficult spot. Was I an experiment? Did he think I was one of the 'good Aboriginals'?
I've since learnt that some things aren't so easy to understand, especially when it comes to dating. It's not like I can go to the library and read up on it, what would I even look for? One of my biggest fears when meeting a white fella is their potential lack of cultural awareness. These days when I'm considering dating a guy that's not Aboriginal, I have a shopping list of questions I'd like answered first:. Throughout history, Aboriginal women and many white women also have had to protect themselves from white men.
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In the words of Malcolm X: Well damn! The same could be said for Australia. There's still a sense that Aboriginal women aren't as beautiful or deserving of love and respect than other women.
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This year an old clip of South African comedian Trevor Noah criticising the appearance of Aboriginal women surfaced — this man of colour was ridiculing us black women! Also, there's a bunch of cringe-worthy sexual stereotypes to navigate.
No Asians, no black people. Why do gay people tolerate blatant racism?
How dreadful to have to negotiate the saying, "Once you go black, you never go back". I recently spoke to a woman of colour about my dilemma. I asked her if she would date a white man. Most couples will get to a point in their relationship when things start to get a bit more serious. It'll prompt different conversations, either it's shall we get a dog?
Or should we move in together? But I'm dating someone who isn't Aboriginal, I dread other types of conversations because our whole relationship depends on how they pan out. Expecting him to have all the right answers is unrealistic.
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But you can tell when someone means well and when they don't. Ah, I'm kidding but it would cross my mind. But what I would do in this situation is keep the conversation going, to discover each other's perspectives. That said, there is limit to how many ignorant racist perspectives a person of colour can endure, and I shouldn't have to continuously defend myself, my race, or my people. But sadly, that's our life. Personally, I hate confrontation because I'm not very good at it. Really — I fold like a cheap suit.
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