We strongly recommend you set up a high-quality VPN on your phone before going to protect your privacy, to remain anonymous and to keep access to your favorite websites and apps. Better safe than sorry! Using apps like Scruff, Grindr and Hornet is your way to tap into the gay scene of wherever you are and find secret gay bars, underground parties, and other events. As a word of warning, if you are traveling somewhere where LGBT rights are not great, make sure you get a secure VPN on your phone to protect your privacy and, in some places, unblock these apps.
Elevating the game is Taimi, a newcomer designed for gay men seeking real connections. We also love that Taimi is focussed on the security and safety of its users with special verification and authentication systems to keep fake accounts out. There is nothing worse than a professional catfish right? And there is also the possibility of creating groups where users can launch discussions, organize events, cooperate and collaborate with NGOs. This is the social network aspect and we are obsessed with it. There is also a collaboration with the Trevor Project meaning users can contact Trevor immediately from their profiles and the possibility of making video calls, meaning Taimi is one of the best gay apps currently out there!
So get downloading now to form quality connections, stay safe and share without being judged! As you might guess from the name, Scruff is the slightly rough-around-the-edges version of Grindr, developed for those guys who like a little, well, scruff! The users tend to be that bit more masc and a little older than on Grindr, although with its growing popularity there are plenty to choose from.
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You can scroll for nearby and around the world, so could always set up a meet-up in your destination in advance. While there are a lot of similarities between Hornet and Grindr, the newer Hornet works much more smoothly, with less of the irritating ads that pop up on Grindr to get in between you and your new piece of eye candy. What makes Hornet so great for gay travelers are the community features that help users network beyond dating.
It started in Berlin and has now spread around the world and, while heavy on the hook-ups, also enables users to find friends, dates or learn more about LGBT issues. It aims to be a safe and friendly environment where you can live your queer life to the fullest.
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The app is free and it just takes creating a quick profile to get you in touch with tonnes of guys all over the world. Wait, what? This is the largest gay social network in the world? Well, it was developed in China and the majority of its 27 million users are there. Internet censorship is rife in China and Blued is a way of getting around the banning of sites like Grindr. Its founder is a former policeman and committed to LGBT rights and we love that the network is now in partnership with Hornet.
Although it might have been set up as a Grindr for straight people, there are now lots of gays using it; just set your preferences and enjoy the wealth of choice there. Calling all bears, or fans of bears; this is the gay hookup app for you. Such logic dictates that the masculine drive to put a P in a V is so strong, it completely negates any semblance of same-sex attraction. If heterosexuality were truly so rigid, there wouldn't be so many straight guys having "gay" sex.
I'm not the only gay guy on Tinder who's been propositioned by one of the app's straight users.
It's so weird! These stories are in line with what's actually a long history of straight dudes engaging in gay sex, which Ward explores in her book.
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Data backs up the reality. Some examples, such as Hell's Angel bikers who would sometimes make out with each other, were instances of ironically asserting masculinity. The fact that we're quick to label such behavior as "gay" says a lot about our culture. Above all else, the examples of dude-on-dude intimacy discussed in Ward's book reveal just how much we cleave to our definition of heteronormative masculinity. This limited view is evident by how those who are strictly dickly — straight women and gay men — are conditioned to view even the most mildly bi-curious guys.
One experience means he's gay, in the closet," Ward said. That can prompt fears on the part of a straight woman that her male partner isn't attracted to her, or he'll ditch her to be with a man, Grace and Frankie -style. That fetishization isn't always positive, as some relationships between gay men and the straight men who dabble with them are underpinned with resentment.
We have to teach ourselves to see male sexual fluidity, as well as women's. I'd be lying if I said that learning about all the straight men supposedly having sex with gay men didn't make me skeptical and cause some sexual FOMO.
But allowing personal hangups on masculinity and heterosexuality to shape our views of the straight men in our lives may only rob men of their sexual agency and refresh the cycle of homophobia. I'll never really know why Benjamin swiped right on me on Tinder.
He blocked me shortly after our exchange, and while it's very possible that this was because he was closeted, it's equally possible that he isn't. Maybe he just wanted a " bro-job " and was able to find it more easily from someone else. Or maybe his curiosity had just expired, and he wanted to get back to swiping on his primary sexual interest: Getty Images.
Copy link. By Nicolas DiDomizio. Email Follow. Related stories by this author. Recommended video. Mark Ruffalo: Stand up for Native American rights.