So you have to be able to navigate a relationship with significant differences in income and wealth, which can be an added complication for some people and no big deal for others. I have a gay friend who is kinda into me, and being bi, I'm kinda into him. He isn't much younger than me, just 10 years, and his nickname for me is DaddyBoss. Took me a while to figure out the daddy thing But for an older seemingly straight guy, to the outside world anyway, it did catch my ear in an odd way at first.
Mizz Liz - I'm afraid that gets a serious Grade of Execution deduction. Mr Fry is a genius. He also has a great deal of personal integrity. After I became a GGGM in Amsterdam twenty years ago this summer - oh, dear , one of the GGSMs I met there and befriended, who was then both "objectively" prettier and probably more talented than the current Mrr Fry although it's hard to compare across disciplines made a serious play for Mr Fry, which was declined with regret, as Mr F was partnered at the time.
My friend was so disappointed he turned bi and, if I've been correctly informed, has had official relationships only with women ever since. That sounds like a joke, but I genuinely think it's at least half-true. Note that I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt, and assuming that you are only commenting on LW's smaller chances of an LTR due to lacking celebrity or wealth, and not lumping Mr Fry in with the Mr Trumps of the world. Had I thought the latter to be your intention, I'd be packing a lorgnette. Your Mutual Consolation Prize suggestion doesn't come across that well. Besides, it seems as if LW's relationship energy flows to the young and not just his libido.
Mr S may be right to warn him off thinking that a thing of beauty will be a boy forever, but, if LW is seriously mentally 24 or so himself, his mental age might advance as the relationship does. I wish this were a podcast call, so that Mr Savage could though he wouldn't get LW on the line and go deeper. Taking that much farther feels like deciding on my own performance, which Elizabeth Bennet told Mr Darcy she mustn't do.
I shall close here. Dan, didn't you answer a letter almost exactly like this not too long ago?
A Step-by-Step Approach To Feeling More Confident and Less Insecure
Like within the last year? You can be in a successful relationship even if there is a big age difference. If you love them for who they are and not just their hot bodies, you can maintain an successful LTR! Fred 12, how does a troll learn how to behave in civilized society, if they are not commended whenever they make a worthwhile comment? All of us were basically trolls at birth and throughout toddlerhood, and many among us persist as trolls into grade school and beyond, but I'm optimistic enough to believe that anyone can learn to improve their social skills with sufficient positive feedback.
I don't believe in shunning someone for past bad behavior, partly because I would hate to be judged solely for bad decisions I've made in my own lifetime. I'm 25, gay, and married to a guy my age; as someone who is living out what the LW wished he could have lived out, I feel I have to back Dan here. I've been out for over a decade and like LW, I have only ever since being legal been in relationships with feminine males guys that make most twinks seem masculine , so I understand the exclusivity this LW feels, in a big way. Let me assure LW that there are younger guys who would knife fight for the chance to be in something long-term with an older male.
For many, it's the dream. Say what you will about heteronormativity, but the stereotypes about young guys hooking up with older, financially secure men have their basis in reality. I'm not saying LW must be a sugar daddy, being able to live on your own as an adult is sexy in anyone. I am saying, however, that LW is finding hookups because he's looking for hookups, not because he is locked into them.
Plus, he's even writing those off too early. I found my husband on a fetish site and we've been together for five years and are still going gangbusters, he's my best friend. We know a considerable number of young, just-out-of-college guys who would do just about anything to get with a guy like LW long-term. I'd be careful of anyone too thirsty, but don't count yourself out of the game just when you've started playing. LW is new to all of this. He ought to enjoy his STRs while he has them, because eventually a LTR situation will present itself--it happens all the time--and when it does, who knows?
He absolutely could learn to look past someone not being 24 any more, and could discover that some of the things he likes about younger guys can translate into older men as well. At 49, he still has a good chunk of time left to live the dream. Err, I meant to say that like LW, I've only ever been into guys who are typically considered younger, twinky, etc.
I didn't mean to imply he was necessarily into feminine guys, apologies. No doubt plenty of people find happy relationships across the generations, as I stated it's possible.
The pros and cons of younger/older relationships – Gay San Diego
No doubt also that Stephen Fry and his husband are genuinely happy, as I also stated. But let's not pretend that immense wealth and celebrity a reputation as a national treasure- and one I think is deserved doesn't make things easier. Seems silly to kid ourselves about it. Likewise no doubt Trump and Melania are themselves well suited- a person with any scruples at all would not be with someone like Trump just because he's a rich celebrity- I have no high esteem for her.
The same in reverse for Stephen Fry's husband- I'm sure he's a smart funny guy who must meet sincere and genuine mutual needs, etc. It's possible in both cases that these perfect matches would've come along even without the money or fame, but it's far more likely for them to happen in the presence of money or fame. For average folks who are not rich, these things are perfectly possible but less likely- that does not mean Fry and his husband do not genuinely love another or that Trump and Melania are not perfectly matched.
Wait, I misread. He's been out for twelve years, which means he's been at this longer than I have. Boy, don't I look silly! Okay, in that case, there's something else at play here. BTW Venn let me be clear that I think it's obvious that having wealth means you have a larger pool of mates. This is normal, and I thought it was indisputable- just like having good looks or certain personality traits mean you have a larger pool of mates. Sure you can find real love there like you can with a smaller pool but a larger pool does increase your chances.
Therefore it seems a little pointless to give advice to someone about a thing by pointing out an extreme example of that tendency. Like, if I were to say that I'm a fairly good looking woman and ask about my potential mates, it might be useful for someone to point out what chances I might have, but it seems stupid to say "well you know supermodels have no problem finding a date" etc.
So yeah, the dude is older, he has no problem finding dates, and older millionaires likewise can pretty easily find younger people to marry them, and older rich brilliant celebrity millionaires can even find a younger person to marry them that appears to genuinely love them. What this has to do with advice to an average older person, I do not know.
That's not to say that I think an older person finding a mate to love and marry them is either difficult or necessarily desirable or not- as I think the rest of my post indicated. Just that it seems pointless to mention what millionaire celebrity national treasures can do. He might think he should want that at his age and 12 years of screwing around, but o sounds like his focus is having a regular ageless college boy on hand for sex, not tea and sympathy. On the other hand, there's nothing wrong with identifying what you want and pursuing it, even if it's just sex with frat boys.
I commend him for following the campsite rule. Oh, and last thought, we don't know how long we have.
He could lose a young lover to texting while driving in 18 months. So just being younger doesn't guarantee they'll outlive you. What do you talk about, though? I am not sure i could have a relationship with 24yo male I'm a 49yo female. Commie 1: No, you know what's crazy? Being sex-negative, and making up alias after alias for the sole purpose of trolling a sex-positive advice column. THAT's crazy. Emma 6: I agree, bad examples. Cap How is Commie's judgmental snark 1 "a worthwhile comment"? The rest of your comment 5 was compassionate and insightful.
Please do not feed the troll.
The pros and cons of younger/older relationships
Great comment, and your original post did not imply at all that the younger men DADDY was into were feminine. As a cis female who prefers her men younger -- but not college-age; like Offwhitewalls, they're too annoying to make the nice bodies tolerable -- DADDY may find that his preferred age range inches up slightly as he gets older.
So in his mids, his young toyboys may be And year-olds can, in fact, be relationship material if you let them be. My latest toyboy has lasted nearly four years now. It can work. And calling those folks "trolls" is intellectual cowardice. That is the problem with The Left; unwilling to tolerate even the presence of ideas that differ from it's own narrow bigoted failed and ever failing orthodoxy. In the real world those ideas can't be deleted and hidden.