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Sara-Kate hadn't planned on becoming a sugar baby. Then again, most people don't. On a whim during her senior year at Tufts University, Sara-Kate joined Seeking Arrangement , a popular app that matches wannabe sugar babies and daddies to create potentially lucrative arrangements.

The first excursion she went on through the app was, to her, much like a "normal date" — other than the way it ended. She was taken aback. But being a sugar baby can be more complicated that many people realize. The narrative that surrounds sugar babies is fairly simple. The general idea is that a young and attractive woman meets regularly with an older and wealthy man, and the young woman is then showered with gifts as a "reward" for spending time with the man. These gifts, to be clear, are expensive ones. First class flights, lavish beauty treatments , designer bags, luxury jewelry, or, simply, some stacks of cash to be used however the woman — AKA the sugar baby — sees fit.

Based on the shiny material benefits that have become integral to the sugar baby myths, it shouldn't come as a surprise that there are certain stigmas that surround people who engage in the sugar baby lifestyle. Or, to use the particular lingo that many sugar babies favor, people who engage in "sugaring. Read more: But for people like Sara-Kate, being a sugar baby is just another way of dating — with some practical applications.


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At the time she started using Seeking Arrangements, Sara-Kate was disillusioned with her dating prospects and the job she had lined up after graduation. She thought that using the app could help her escape the monotony she saw as pervasive in post-grad life. Ron said the three of them should meet at a hotel of Ms. He said he wanted to meet midday, in between a lunch meeting and a dinner meeting. He asked Ms. Fowles to book the room.

He also told Ms. Fowles how he would like her and her friend to look. He wanted them to wear thongs and high heels. Heavy makeup. Fowles said he told her. So she and her friend went to Drybar for blowouts and met him in the lobby of the Aloft hotel, where Ms. He was in grubby clothes and did not look like he had just come from a lunch meeting.

An ex-sugar baby reveals 4 things people always get wrong about the job

He said he had run home after lunch to change into comfortable clothes. Once they were up in the room, they got down to business.

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Fowles asked Ron to pay them upfront. Though Ron had clearly wanted to communicate on the telephone to avoid making a digital footprint with text messages, he said he wanted to pay her and her friend via the PayPal app. He told Ms. Fowles he could write off the expense if he paid it digitally. He then pulled out his phone, said he was accepting the request as he tapped away at his screen. Fowles and her friend then had sex with Ron.

It's like having a girlfriend — but I'll never get married

After his request for a massage they said yes and then a request for another go-round they said no , he bid them adieu. Fowles had another friend who was curious about sugar dating and who happened upon a profile on Tinder that caught her eye. It was a guy named Jay. The friend requested that her name not be used in this article, on the advice of a lawyer representing her as plaintiff in an unrelated case against a man she met on a dating app.

The friend took a screenshot of the Tinder profile and texted it to Ms. Fowles, who immediately recognized the backstory that the man who hoodwinked her had used on SeekingArrangement.

After discussing the drama, the two women decided to take advantage of the unusual circumstance. The friend swiped right on Jay.


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  • After a quick private message exchange, he suggested they speak on the phone. The number he gave her was the same number for Ron, Ms. They had a conversation and he gave her the same story: Ron was his real name, he was an investment banker at Bain and he had a long-term arrangement with a young woman that had enabled her to enroll in graduate school in Michigan. He explained his preference for a smoky eye and a nude lip.

    An ex-sugar baby explains what people get wrong about her job - INSIDER

    He wanted to meet near the Jay Street-MetroTech subway station. Before the scheduled meeting, Ms. Fowles went to scope out the scene. Around Fowles texted her friend, back at her apartment in Windsor Terrace, to alert her. The friend then texted Ron that she had arrived early and was in the ladies room. The bartender casually walked over to the side of the bar where Ms.

    Fowles was perched.

    Everyone is on it for the same reasons as you

    He spelled the first and last name on the credit card. Not Jay. Visit Site Get App.

    Being a sugar baby isn't all about receiving extravagant gifts

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